Someone You Know Has Cancer. What Now?

So, someone you know has been diagnosed with breast cancer. What next? I had a conversation this morning with someone who was just recently diagnosed with breast cancer. Fortunately I was able to help her, support her, advise her, and just listen. I say fortunately, because I have been on that journey twice before. Anyway, having the conversation, reminded me of how uncomfortable different people were around me once they found out I had breast cancer. They didn't know how to act or what to say. Of course, me being my verbal and open self, I was able to let them know what I needed or didn't need from them. So, my advice to those people who are in that place is to simply ask the person with cancer what they want and need. Do you want to talk about it? Do you want me to ask questions? Do you want me to help you in any way? Do you want me to pray for you and add you to prayer lists? Do you want me to help you gather the latest medical information? Do you want me to just sit here? Do you want me to just listen? Do you want me to leave you alone? Do you want me to shave my head? My point is, rather than spend time and energy worrying about saying or doing the wrong thing, simply ask. The person with cancer will appreciate your straightforwardness and honesty in asking. Cancer has a way of really bringing the things that are important in your life to the forefront. Have honest, heartfelt conversations. Admit you are afraid. Admit you are sad. Admit that you are angry. Admit you are thankful it isn't you. Cancer is ugly, scary, and sometimes unpredictable. Once we acknowledge that, we can get down to fighting it and taking one appointment at a time. So, again, simply ask the person with cancer what they need or want from you and then do it, give it, say it, or be it.

Today is wear a star sticker day.

Suggestions?

So, I'm looking for input. I'm so excited about Nic and Kristen and their enthusiasm about the BE KINDER mission, wristbands, etc. They are high school kids that are proving that it is cool to be kind. They have passed out and continue to pass out wristbands...about 300 or so. That's amazing! Nic thinks I need to have a fan page on Facebook so people can post pics and comments. I'm going to try to get that done this weekend. Where I need the input from you is on ideas or suggestions you may have that I can do to increase the amount of people looking at my blog, commenting on the blog, and leaving their own stories. On my website bekinder.net there is a tab that says BE KINDER STORIES. It is my hope that people will start writing there and sharing. I've had offers to advertise on my site, but I really don't want to have the people that visit it to be bombarded with miscellaneous ads. I put a daily BE KINDER thought on Facebook and also Tweet a daily thought. The problem is, I don't have very many "friends"...lol. My niece Mariah just texted me that she is going to put a link on her Facebook page. Whoohoo! I would so appreciate any suggestions you may have. If you want wristbands, let me know. Thank you in advance for being kinder and helping me out.

Today is wear brown day.

Michael Jackson versus Conrad Murray

So, I'm promising myself that I am not going to get wrapped up in the Conrad Murray/Michael Jackson trial...but...I must say...Before yesterday I felt that Murray had just made a horrible mistake that resulted in Jackson's death. I actually felt a little bit sorry for him and the place he has found himself in. Then, yesterday, too many things that were said have completely changed my mind. Murray ordered 4 gallons of propofol in the span of about 4 months. Murray left Jackson alone with no monitoring equipment...to talk on the phone, email, use the bathroom, etc. Murray found Jackson not breathing while he was on the phone talking to a woman and did not tell her to call 911. Murray called Jackson's assistant and told him to come to the house immediately and did not tell him to call 911. When the assistant got there Murray had him help collect all the vials and syringes of medications and put them in a bag. The assistant called 911. Murray performed CPR with 1 hand and on the bed, instead of 2 hands on the floor. Murray did not tell EMS about the propofol when specifically asked what Jackson had been given. Murray did not tell the ER doctors about the propofol when specifically asked what Jackson had been given. Besides all that, there are drugs that can be given to reverse the effects of propofol and there were none in the house. The final straw for me was when Murray's attorney announced that Michael Jackson had given himself an overdose when Murray was out of the room. That made me angry. Not because it was Michael Jackson and not because it was Conrad Murray, but because it was a supposed doctor blaming a dead patient for his own death and not accepting an ounce of responsibility for his part in the tragedy. Yes, Jackson was probably an addict, but Murray touts himself as being a physician and should have either gotten Jackson some help or completely refused to treat him. As far as I am concerned, Murray made so many medical, ethical, and morally wrong decisions that he needs to be held accountable.

Today is help cook dinner and clean the kitchen day.

Thankful to Have a Job

Busy, hectic day today. Trying to master the changes at work. Not much on my brain but that. Except, being extremely thankful that I have a job and a career that I absolutely love. So, that's my mantra today...Thank you for allowing me to work in a profession that I love.

Today is draw 10 butterflies day.

30 minutes

Today is a good day. It is finally starting to cool off a bit in Arizona. Nice morning walk with the neighbor and our dogs. Lots of rabbits, birds, and nature. Nice to come home not sweating for a change. We've been going through a lot of changes at work lately and try as I might to be positive, I was getting a bit frustrated and nervous. Enter Jennifer, today's life saver. I won't bore you with all the details, but this gal is amazing. She showed me short-cuts to help with the new system and get me back up to speed. Whoohoo! It is amazing what 30 minutes on the phone has done to adjust my attitude. Makes me wonder was the best way to spend 30 minutes helping someone else would be today. I better get busy!

Today is play outside together for 30 minutes day.

We Have Got To Do Something

Someone asked me the other day what I thought about Susan Powell's father-in-law being arrested. I had to ask her who Susan Powell was. For those of you who don't know, she is the woman who disappeared in North Dakota when her husband had taken their two sons camping in the snow. I told her I remembered the story. I told her that with all the missing and murdered children and adults, throw in a few politicians and celebrity scandals, I have a hard time keeping everyone straight. How many times do we hear about the frantic search for someone on the news or on-line, and then we hear nothing about whether or not they were ever found. Does that mean that they weren't found? Does it mean someone else got away with something horrific? Does it mean they were never truly missing? I'm sure the people directly involved are either really happy or really devastated. I tend to get emotionally invested in the missing, abused and murdered children and have written about them before in my much earlier blogs. We have got to do something. We have got to be paying attention. There is always someone who has seen something. There is always someone who knows something. There is no reason that any child should be missing. There is no reason that any child should be abused. There is no reason that any child should be murdered. Same is true for adults. We have got to do something. I'm at a loss.

Today is clean for an hour day.

Enjoy The Time

Short blog today. Going to spend the day with Christopher. Bike jumps, casino, and probably a meal. Doesn't really matter what we do...I just really enjoy the time and try to make the most of every moment. This is what memories are made of. Enjoy the time you spend today.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.