Someone You Know Has Cancer. What Now?

So, someone you know has been diagnosed with breast cancer. What next? I had a conversation this morning with someone who was just recently diagnosed with breast cancer. Fortunately I was able to help her, support her, advise her, and just listen. I say fortunately, because I have been on that journey twice before. Anyway, having the conversation, reminded me of how uncomfortable different people were around me once they found out I had breast cancer. They didn't know how to act or what to say. Of course, me being my verbal and open self, I was able to let them know what I needed or didn't need from them. So, my advice to those people who are in that place is to simply ask the person with cancer what they want and need. Do you want to talk about it? Do you want me to ask questions? Do you want me to help you in any way? Do you want me to pray for you and add you to prayer lists? Do you want me to help you gather the latest medical information? Do you want me to just sit here? Do you want me to just listen? Do you want me to leave you alone? Do you want me to shave my head? My point is, rather than spend time and energy worrying about saying or doing the wrong thing, simply ask. The person with cancer will appreciate your straightforwardness and honesty in asking. Cancer has a way of really bringing the things that are important in your life to the forefront. Have honest, heartfelt conversations. Admit you are afraid. Admit you are sad. Admit that you are angry. Admit you are thankful it isn't you. Cancer is ugly, scary, and sometimes unpredictable. Once we acknowledge that, we can get down to fighting it and taking one appointment at a time. So, again, simply ask the person with cancer what they need or want from you and then do it, give it, say it, or be it.

Today is wear a star sticker day.

Suggestions?

So, I'm looking for input. I'm so excited about Nic and Kristen and their enthusiasm about the BE KINDER mission, wristbands, etc. They are high school kids that are proving that it is cool to be kind. They have passed out and continue to pass out wristbands...about 300 or so. That's amazing! Nic thinks I need to have a fan page on Facebook so people can post pics and comments. I'm going to try to get that done this weekend. Where I need the input from you is on ideas or suggestions you may have that I can do to increase the amount of people looking at my blog, commenting on the blog, and leaving their own stories. On my website bekinder.net there is a tab that says BE KINDER STORIES. It is my hope that people will start writing there and sharing. I've had offers to advertise on my site, but I really don't want to have the people that visit it to be bombarded with miscellaneous ads. I put a daily BE KINDER thought on Facebook and also Tweet a daily thought. The problem is, I don't have very many "friends"...lol. My niece Mariah just texted me that she is going to put a link on her Facebook page. Whoohoo! I would so appreciate any suggestions you may have. If you want wristbands, let me know. Thank you in advance for being kinder and helping me out.

Today is wear brown day.

Michael Jackson versus Conrad Murray

So, I'm promising myself that I am not going to get wrapped up in the Conrad Murray/Michael Jackson trial...but...I must say...Before yesterday I felt that Murray had just made a horrible mistake that resulted in Jackson's death. I actually felt a little bit sorry for him and the place he has found himself in. Then, yesterday, too many things that were said have completely changed my mind. Murray ordered 4 gallons of propofol in the span of about 4 months. Murray left Jackson alone with no monitoring equipment...to talk on the phone, email, use the bathroom, etc. Murray found Jackson not breathing while he was on the phone talking to a woman and did not tell her to call 911. Murray called Jackson's assistant and told him to come to the house immediately and did not tell him to call 911. When the assistant got there Murray had him help collect all the vials and syringes of medications and put them in a bag. The assistant called 911. Murray performed CPR with 1 hand and on the bed, instead of 2 hands on the floor. Murray did not tell EMS about the propofol when specifically asked what Jackson had been given. Murray did not tell the ER doctors about the propofol when specifically asked what Jackson had been given. Besides all that, there are drugs that can be given to reverse the effects of propofol and there were none in the house. The final straw for me was when Murray's attorney announced that Michael Jackson had given himself an overdose when Murray was out of the room. That made me angry. Not because it was Michael Jackson and not because it was Conrad Murray, but because it was a supposed doctor blaming a dead patient for his own death and not accepting an ounce of responsibility for his part in the tragedy. Yes, Jackson was probably an addict, but Murray touts himself as being a physician and should have either gotten Jackson some help or completely refused to treat him. As far as I am concerned, Murray made so many medical, ethical, and morally wrong decisions that he needs to be held accountable.

Today is help cook dinner and clean the kitchen day.

Thankful to Have a Job

Busy, hectic day today. Trying to master the changes at work. Not much on my brain but that. Except, being extremely thankful that I have a job and a career that I absolutely love. So, that's my mantra today...Thank you for allowing me to work in a profession that I love.

Today is draw 10 butterflies day.

30 minutes

Today is a good day. It is finally starting to cool off a bit in Arizona. Nice morning walk with the neighbor and our dogs. Lots of rabbits, birds, and nature. Nice to come home not sweating for a change. We've been going through a lot of changes at work lately and try as I might to be positive, I was getting a bit frustrated and nervous. Enter Jennifer, today's life saver. I won't bore you with all the details, but this gal is amazing. She showed me short-cuts to help with the new system and get me back up to speed. Whoohoo! It is amazing what 30 minutes on the phone has done to adjust my attitude. Makes me wonder was the best way to spend 30 minutes helping someone else would be today. I better get busy!

Today is play outside together for 30 minutes day.

We Have Got To Do Something

Someone asked me the other day what I thought about Susan Powell's father-in-law being arrested. I had to ask her who Susan Powell was. For those of you who don't know, she is the woman who disappeared in North Dakota when her husband had taken their two sons camping in the snow. I told her I remembered the story. I told her that with all the missing and murdered children and adults, throw in a few politicians and celebrity scandals, I have a hard time keeping everyone straight. How many times do we hear about the frantic search for someone on the news or on-line, and then we hear nothing about whether or not they were ever found. Does that mean that they weren't found? Does it mean someone else got away with something horrific? Does it mean they were never truly missing? I'm sure the people directly involved are either really happy or really devastated. I tend to get emotionally invested in the missing, abused and murdered children and have written about them before in my much earlier blogs. We have got to do something. We have got to be paying attention. There is always someone who has seen something. There is always someone who knows something. There is no reason that any child should be missing. There is no reason that any child should be abused. There is no reason that any child should be murdered. Same is true for adults. We have got to do something. I'm at a loss.

Today is clean for an hour day.

Enjoy The Time

Short blog today. Going to spend the day with Christopher. Bike jumps, casino, and probably a meal. Doesn't really matter what we do...I just really enjoy the time and try to make the most of every moment. This is what memories are made of. Enjoy the time you spend today.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.

Food and Song Memories

Funny how tasting a certain food or hearing a certain song can transport your mind back to an exact moment in time. Homemade ice cream reminds me of making ice cream in the backyard in Lakeview, the rock salt, the taking turns turning the handle and how it would get harder and harder to turn, then Dad would take over. It seemed to melt quicker than store bought ice cream. Goulash, scalloped potatoes, popcorn balls (Christmas and Halloween), pulled taffy (birthday parties), blond brownies (Mom's Bridge night), Jello-O with homemade whipped cream, Wheaties with cream from the top of the glass milk container that was delivered. Fortunately, my food memories are good ones. Are yours? Peter Frampton, Heart (concert with Dad), Michael Jackson, Whispers, Teddy Pendergrass (college), Hotel California (dentist, bad memory), John Denver, James Taylor, and Carol King. Talk about flashbacks. With all the memories we have, it is amazing how a simple thing can prompt our brains so quickly. I wonder what kind of memories we are making for our children and grandchildren. Will they remember food you cooked for them? Songs you listened to and sang with them? Will they be happy memories? I wonder.

Today is eat Taco Time Day.

Celebrity Obsession

Just sitting here wondering what our obsession with celebrity gossip is representative of. I almost feel sorry for half of them that just want to live their lives and entertain us, but don't want to be our best friends. Can you imagine if your neighbors or coworkers felt they deserved an explanation for everything you did in your life, the conversations you had or didn't have, the relationships you had or didn't have; or tweeted or Facebook'd every time you went shopping along with a complete analysis of what you bought, wore, ate, etc. Pretty scary. Almost makes me more acutely aware of what I'm doing out "there". Just for today, pretend everything you do, wear, say, and eat will be known by everyone. Will you change anything for tomorrow?

Today is taste warm bread day.

International Day of Peace

Today is International Day of Peace. Makes me think of internal peace. Internal as in inside of me. Internal as in inside of my personal space. We can aspire for international peace, but if we don't have peace within ourselves, our families, our communities, how can we possibly think we can achieve it internationally? I feel mostly at peace with myself, but do have my moments of turmoil. I feel at peace in the midst of my family. Community? I'm not quite sure. I feel at peace inside my home in my community and in my immediate surroundings, but I'm not sure about further out. As I write this, I'm thinking that trust is a big part of peace. Do I trust those "outside"? I'd like to, but.... Same goes, I suppose, for other countries. Then we must realize too that my idea of peace may not be the same as yours, our idea of peace may not be the same as theirs. Rambling, I know. I guess, I'll just focus on my internal peace and the peace around me and hopefully if enough people are doing the same then eventually all our "peaces" will blend together and thus...international peace. Hmmm, nice something to ponder.

Today is sit in a circle and giggle and laugh day.

Family Memories

Whoohoo! My mom got her ticket to come back to Arizona in November. They have a wonderful cabin on the Kenai River in Alaska where they live from April to November or December and then come to their place in Arizona the other part of the year. Every year I look so forward to have them here. They keep me busy. Walks with dad and a baseball game or two, quiet conversations. Movies, board games, shopping, and memory-making moments with mom. Lots of laughter. I am so blessed to be able to spend time with them and am so thankful for the relationships we have. There are so many families that are broken, so much animosity and anger, so many lost loved ones. At the end of the day, what really matters? I've never heard anyone say, "I wish I wouldn't have been as close with my family. I regret all the time and moments I spent with my parents or children. I wish I would've seen more faults. I wish I wouldn't have been so nice. I wish I would've spent more holidays alone." My point is, if there are unresolved issues or tension in your family, maybe it's time you fixed them. Not only will you enjoy the moments you spend now, but the memories will be so much more rewarding than the guilt for not having done or said things you wish you would have. As for me...I will continue to love and appreciate mine.

Today is write the word "love" ten times day.

Love Ya Habit

Last week my sister was telling me about listening to a particular speaker who was taking about how we need to put the "I" back in "I love you". Since then, I am acutely aware of how many times I say or text "love ya", almost as if a habit. So, I've started to say "I love you" with a more "definitely" tone of voice. It feels better to me. I think we get into a comfortable habit with people we love or live with where we just go through the motions. We assume they know we love them. We assume they know they can count on us. We assume they know how much they mean to us. We assume they feel the same about ourselves. When was the last time, you actually had a conversation with your partner, child, parent, friend, etc., about how much it means to you to have them in your life? When was the last time someone told you how much you mean to them? For today, why not start a conversation with someone about how much they mean to you? You might be surprised how good it makes you both feel. Don't assume people know how you truly feel about them. Put voice to those feelings and let them know.

Today is hug each other and say I love you day.

Overtime

This is actually for Sunday, time clock is messed up.

I'm being kinder to my bank account today by working overtime.

Today is clean for 1 hour day.

Unexpected Surprises

I think unexpected surprises are the best kind. Whether you are on the giving end or the receiving end. Last night my son surprised me with a beautiful silver charm bracelet with bird, peace sign, cancer ribbon, stars and moons and suns, and Gramma green and orange and blue beads. It is gorgeous and soooo me. I absolutely don't think the cost of a gift matters, but...if you know my son, you know how hard it is for him to spend money. So, in this case, it means even more...if that makes sense. (smile). His friend helped him pick out everything and asked what color scheme I liked and he said "all colors", which is so true. He knows I love birds and peace and Gramma green. The pink cancer ribbon is a no-brainer. The stars and moons and suns are also important things to me. My point is, the more personal and thought-full a gift is, the more touched a person is when they receive it. We can all go out and buy the latest gadget or expensive jewelry or something that basically says "it's your birthday so I got you a present". But, when someone takes the time to really think about the person they are giving the gift to, it means so, so much more. Thank you, Bud, I love my surprise.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.

Take a Breath

A little late today. Busy, busy. Left the casino with more money than I went with, laid in the sun with my Friday afternoon friend and now getting ready to work. I like days like this. It's nice to get away from the TV and computer every once in a while. Not too much on my mind, but relaxing, something I don't seem to do enough. We all seem to be moving so fast through our days and weeks. It's nice to stop and take a breath every now and then. That's it.

Today is sit in a circle and make up a story that begins with...The gray cat...day.

A Different Sort of Birthday

Today is the birthday of an amazing woman I never met. I will light a candle and sing Happy Birthday to her. I will reread letters and remember thoughts and plans we had. I will celebrate her with love and have conversations with her in my mind, confident she is hearing my words. I will thank her for everything she did for me and mine. I will, once again, thank God for bringing her into my life when He did.

That's all for today.

Today is celebrate Faye day.

Slow Down The Swirling in Your Mind

I'm tired today. I don't know if it is the change in weather from hotter and dry to hot and humid or what. Anyway, nothing specific on my mind today, but thoughts are swirling around in a frenetic way. Do you ever feel that you are so busy simply because you have so much going on in your head, and yet physically you aren't doing anything. It's exhausting. It's amazing how fast a mind can race from one topic to another. For example...need to pay the bills, need to go to the store, need to vacuum, need to start a load of laundry, man my windows need washing, it's hot, need to answer emails and blog, need to eat, a nap sounds good, need to get ready for work...Whew! Making lists helps sometimes. Not only do you keep things organized, but you get the bonus feeling as you check them off. I try to BE KINDER to myself and breathe deep and allow my brain to slow down to a more manageable pace. If you think of all those things swirling around in your mind as slowing down, they are still swirling but not as fast, then it seems that the most important things become more clear, some of the others just disappear, and you don't feel so out of control. So, today, if you are feeling overwhelmed, just stop, close your eyes, focus on those things swirling around in your mind and breathe, slow down the swirl and you will be able to focus on what is truly most important.

Today is touch something slippery day.

Act & Observe Kindness

So, I found this awesome app on my IPhone.  I've just gotta share it.  It's actually called "AOK". The picture is a red circle with a white hand inside making the OK sign.  Anyway, you sign in and then you can see all these acts and observations of kindness. If you look at the pic above, the first line says "Submit an AOK".  Click on this and you can tell about the act of kindness you did or an act of kindness you observed.  The "View AOKs" lets you see a list of all the observations and acts of kindness that others have submitted.  The "View Map" shows a map of the United States, Canada, and Mexico and all these little raindrop things drop down and show where acts or observations of kindness are taking place.  It is amazing!  The "My Impact" is a page that sort of keeps a tally of the acts and observations you have made. There is also something called a flashtag that I haven't figured out yet. The "FAQ" is simply that. Tells about the program. I added an observation to my Impact today when Felix at Safeway pulled me away from a tower of ice cream containers that would have fallen on my bare toes had I opened the refrigerator. Thank you Felix!  Anyway, that's it for today. I'd love to hear from anyone who downloads the app and has fun with it. Just another way to encourage the BE KINDER attitude.

Today is write Tayo or Dad ten times and compliment him day.

Routine Or Rut?

As I got up this morning, petted the dogs, and meandered my way to the kitchen to get my coffee going, I realized how comfortable my routine is for me. Let the dogs out, turn on CNN, feed the cats, turn on computers, let the dogs back in, feed the dogs, check on emails and work, answer emails, make the bed, and finally get that cup of coffee. So much done in the first few minutes of the day. Routines can be good things or they can be ruts. I enjoy mine. Do you enjoy yours? If you don't like the way things are in your world, change it. Sometimes even changing a little thing will make a big difference. Whether its driving a different way to work, moving furniture around, changing a hair style, or the way you greet people. Attitude is everything. I think if we enjoy our personal routines it shows in our faces and actions. We all know people who, the second you see them, you know they are unhappy. I bet, the thing that they are unhappy about, they could change...if not the situation, their attitude towards it. Some people simply choose to be unhappy.  As for me, I love my routine. I find comfort in knowing how I'm going to start my day. As long as I am content with where I am, the bumps in the road seem a little bit easier to handle. I guess I'm saying, I'd rather be happy with my routine than unhappy in a rut. How about you?

Today is wear a funny hat, dance around a bucket singing "fill it up, fill it up" under the full moon day.

Remember The Being Kinder?

September 11, 2001.  We all remember the horrific events of that day, where we were, where our family and friends were.  So much emotion that I have no words.  The faces of people simply in shock.  I seemed to cry all the time.  I also remember in the weeks and months following how much kinder people were to each other.  We were all a little more patient, a little less dramatic, and a whole lot more patriotic.  I don't know when that all disappeared, but it seemed to just fade away. Maybe today on the ten year anniversary, we will be reminded of all that was lost, but also of how much more intimate and friendly as a country we became.  That's about it, like I said, I have no words to describe the emotions around my feelings of that day, only that I wish we could get back to where we were following...being kinder to each other.

On a much brighter note...my granddaughter Jayda turns 4 today, so there is a celebration of a wonderful, amazing, spirited child today also.

Today is celebrate Jayda day.

The Choices We Make

I'm thinking about consequences today.  I think about 5% of the things that happen in our lives we have no control over and 95% we are in absolute complete control of.  Everything we do, think, say, and feel is our choice.  It's easy to try and place blame on something or someone else if things are not going the way we want in our lives.  Why is it we can take credit for all the good things and yet not accept responsibility for the bad things?  We choose to speak the words that come out of our mouths.  We choose the people we want to spend time with.  We choose where we want to go and what we want to do.  We choose every single one of our actions.  At any given moment, ask yourself, "How did I get here?"  Whether it is a good place or a bad place, chances are if you think long enough and honestly enough, you will remember the choice you made that put you in this place.  We choose how we react to things and people.  We choose how we feel.  So often we hear "you made me feel...he made me feel...she made me feel".  No, that person did not Make you feel anything.  You chose how to react to what they said or did.  Get it?  Anyway, I just wanted to write a quickie to remind everyone that the consequences in your lives are usually a direct result of some choice you made somewhere along the line.  Take responsibility for your choices whether they be good or bad.  It is amazing how good it feels to know you are in control of what happens in your life...at least 95% of the time.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.

Get Involved

How many times have you been in a situation to see some sort of injustice taking place?  Did you do anything?  Did you say anything?  It seems like the news is riddled with people abusing and killing each other, stealing, etc., and inevitably there are people that come out and say things like, "I knew it was just a matter of time...that poor little girl had bruises all the time...I saw him torturing his dog...I heard her screaming all the time...Everyone knew it was going on."  There is always someone who has seen or heard something and chose to do nothing, to not get involved.  I wonder if they carry any guilt for knowing they perhaps could have prevented the tragedy and shattered hearts.  I think it's because people don't want to get involved.  But, if you see or hear something, aren't you already involved?  Like Oprah said, "Once you see something, you can't un-see it."  Personally, I would rather choose to get involved and perhaps save someone, than worry about "it's none of my business".  As far as I'm concerned, if something happens in my space, then it is my business. We need to be more involved.  We need to be more aware.  We need to be more concerned with the safety and happiness that swirls around us.  If you know a child is being abused, tell someone.  If you know a person is abusing animals, tell someone.  If you know someone is being unfaithful to their partner, tell them if they don't tell their partner you will.  If you hear screaming or threats, tell someone.  If you know someone is stealing, then tell someone.  I guess my point is, get involved, help those who seem to be unable to help themselves.  I promise getting involved will be easier to live with than the guilt you may feel if you knew something bad was happening and did nothing about it.  Besides, it is simply the kinder thing to do. 

Today is make Jayda birthday cards day.

Be In The Moment

Today, I'm trying to be more in the moment.  Problem is, at this moment my mind is sort of blank.  Ha! But, if I write about this moment, I would say....The ceiling fan feels awesome.  The doves in the bird feeder outside my office window always make me smile.  The dogs on their beds next to my desk look so comfortable.  My desk is a mess.  Being in the moment sometimes brings about our recognition of simple miracles.  Like the fact that I'm sitting in Arizona and my sister is texting me from Oregon sending me writing inspirations.  Waiting....  Okay, here goes.  It is amazing how many things we can see and feel in any given moment, things we take for granted, things we may have missed until today.  Sort of a meditation in a way, forgetting all the troubles and stresses that may be whirling around you and focusing on what is happening right now.  I'm breathing. The sun is bright and hot outside.  The doves are enjoying breakfast and a bath.  The dogs are dreaming.  I hear a faint tinkle from the windchimes above my desk and a paper being blown by the fan.  My right foot sort of hurts.  I absolutely love the taste of hot Starbucks coffee with cream and sugar.  My tattoo looks lighter when my arm is tan.  Why do I have so many pens on my desk?  I can't believe it's Thursday already.  Phone rings and snaps me back to my reality.  Okay, so I know this is rambling and almost frenetic, but I'm trying to prove a point.  If we can be more in the moment, each moment, then sometimes the things that seem insurmountable in our lives will become less so.  Pick a moment or two today and stop, really pay attention to what is happening around you, what you are feeling.  Are you happy with what you see and feel? 

Today is touch something squishy day.

Be Kinder To Service Providers

As I sit here trying to think of what to write today, I can hear the garbage truck making its rounds through the neighborhood. I wonder if the driver feels appreciated.  So, now I'm thinking about how sometimes we forget to thank the service people we encounter every day.  A pet peeve I have is when people are talking on their cell phone while getting checked out at a grocery store.  The checker is smiling and trying to make conversation and the person on the phone is simply dismissing her.  Same thing at the bank, the post office, and the nail salon.  Are we so electronically connected that we have lost our ability to communicate with those right in front of us?  I wonder how those people who are being ignored are feeling...a little inferior perhaps?  I wonder how those people on the cell phones are feeling...a little superior perhaps?  I wonder what kind of an impact a little friendly conversation would have on those that are providing a service to us.  I wonder how often they are thanked, not in a habit sort of way but in a way where you really look at them in their face and say, "Thank you.  I really appreciate your helping me today."  The next time someone is providing you a service, look at them in their eyes and offer sincere words of kindness and thankfulness.  I wonder if you will feel the difference in their demeanor....and perhaps your own.

Today is wear yellow day.

Teach Our Children Kindness

As all of our children and grandchildren head back to school, they are on their ways to new adventures, new friends, new lessons.  There has been a lot of attention paid to bullying and the effects of bullying, which are all negative.  I wonder if there would be a difference if instead we taught our children about kindness.  I think they probably all know what bullying looks like and what it feels like when they see it or feel it.  But, I wonder how many of those children know what kindness is, what it looks like and what it feels like to see it or feel it.  So often we react and punish only when children are bad, often without explaining to them why they are in trouble or discussing what happened.  Isn't it our responsibility to teach our children the right and kinder things to do?  Isn't it our responsibility to teach our children how to treat everyone with respect and fairness?  Isn't it our responsibility to teach our children by example?  When our children get in trouble, I think it is our responsibility to make sure they understand why they're in trouble and I also think it would serve them best if we help them to think of different ways to stay out of trouble...the kinder way.  Whether kindness to another student, a teacher, a bus driver, a parent, or themselves....I think if we talk about kindness with our children, they will be able to recognize it when they see it and hopefully choose kindness over bullying every time.

Today is sing the ABCs ten times day.

Do It With Kindness

Not too much happening in my world today, which is a good thing.  I'm making another pair of shoes for my granddaughter Jayda.  As I paint the BE KINDER on them, the rainbow, hearts, and sparkles, I think of her and all the good things I want for her. I would like to think that I am painting peace and happiness into the shoes so that when they are on her feet she will feel good things.  Reminds me of a prayer shawl a woman made for me when I was diagnosed with breast cancer the first time.  There is a group of women that make these shawls.  They light candles and say prayers of healing, peace, and all good things while they knit, weaving all their prayers into the pattern.  I believe it works.  While I was going through radiation, etc., I would wrap that shawl around my shoulders and immediately felt healing happening.  I still wrap it around me when I'm needing a little inner warmth and healing.  I believe that whatever we put into things it what we will get out of them...whether its things we create, jobs we do, or thoughts we have.  I believe if we do things with kindness, then kindness will come from them.

Today is buy a plant and take care of it day.

Different Places

So, I'm a little frustrated this morning.  I forget sometimes that even though My mission is to BE KINDER in my actions and my words, others may not be in the same place.  I don't know why I'm always surprised when I come across people who refuse to take responsibility for things they have done or said and instead try to manipulate others into feeling like They are in the wrong.  Manipulation is almost a tangible thing, something you can see and feel as it is happening and yet its difficult to stop...especially while trying to BE KINDER.  I may be coming from a good place, but if the other person is not comfortable with where they are and perhaps feeling guilty, then the conversation can quickly turn into a literal battle of words.  I find these types of conversations exhausting.  How often, when these things happen, can you look back and find the choice someone made in a split second that determined what is happening right at this moment.  I guess the trick is is to be able to make a choice in any moment and be prepared to accept Whatever consequences that eventually come your way as a direct result of that choice.  I know this is a rambling blog, but I've worked through my frustration and am giving it up as of this moment.  I know that the choices and actions that I have made and done in this particular situation were the only ones I could have logically made given the information I had.  I will continue to live my life from a kinder place and accept whatever consequences come my way.

Today is clean for an hour day.

BE KINDER.

Sometimes Nothing Is More

Sometimes being kinder is not saying or doing anything at all, but rather just being.  When a friend is going through a hard time and calls to talk, sometimes they don't need anything but to vent and feel like someone is listening with care.  You may feel the need to jump in and offer advice, opinions, or solutions.  You may feel the need to fix everything for them.  You may feel the need to disagree with their perception of their hard time.  You may feel they are justified.  You may feel they are worrying over something meaningless.  However, what they may need from you is nothing more than your ear or shoulder.  Sometimes the kindest thing you can do is nothing at all.  The trick is to recognize those sometimes for what they are.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.

BE KINDER.

The Power of A Few Words

We need to BE KINDER with our words.  How many times have you said something and wished you could've said it differently or perhaps not at all.  By the same token, have you had someone say something to you that has hurt you in some way, only to have them apologize or try to say it differently to not make you feel bad?  It's funny, well not really, how sometimes we say more than we need to....you know, those little digs that simply serve no purpose at all. We all choose the words we speak and the tone in which they are spoken.  The next time you are in a situation where you feel the need to express your maybe notsohappy feelings, think about your words and ask yourself what is the kindest way to get your point across.  If we choose our words in kindness, they will be received in kindness and can make an uncomfortable or unhappy situation better.

Today is say nursery rhymes together day.

Quick resolutions

Good Morning!  Just a thought.  Another way we can be kinder to ourselves is to resolve things quickly.  If something has happened that has upset you or you have negative thoughts that you can't seem to shake, the best thing you can do for yourself is resolve them quickly.  We spend so much time carrying around energy-consuming unresolved issues that we feel busier and more frantic than we actually are.  I spent the last 12 hours stewing about a situation, trying to make sense, trying to reason, trying to excuse.  Finally, I called the people I needed to who resolved one part, then called another person and we talked and resolved the other part. Whew! I actually feel lighter than I did a couple hours ago.  Amazing how carrying around unresolved issues can bear down on your shoulders and spirit.  So, BE KINDER to yourself and work on quick resolutions to things you have been carrying.  I promise you will appreciate the lighter load.

Today is go for a walk and collect leaves day.

BE KINDER.