Still Here

Thanks to all of you who have been wondering where I've been. I'm good. Just super, super busy with changes at work and life. Mom and Dad are here....finally. But Christopher moved to Portland. He's doing great, but I sure miss the "stop-ins". I'll be back in the swing of it soon. Again, thanks again. Nice to know I've been missed.

Teach Our Children Christmas Kindness.

And so the Christmas rush begins. As I watch people being shoved, trampled on and even pepper sprayed, it makes me sort of sad. Somewhere along the line we have forgotten the meaning of Christmas. Now it's all about getting the biggest, brightest, most expensive gifts. Parents going into huge debt. Grandparents with lots of grandkids stressing over "just the right thing". Funny thing is, we don't see kids stressed about what they are going to get for people, or in the mob-like frenzies at the malls. The gifts I remember the most are the ones that people have made for me, or the ones that are "just what I wanted". It is a good time of year to teach the children in our lives what Christmas truly means. It is a good time to teach them that they don't always get everything they want. It is a good time to teach them about being financially responsible. It is a good time to teach about caring and doing for those of us who don't have the means to get the latest craze items. We should take some of the money that we would be spending on our own and take our children shopping for other children. Pick a name off a Christmas tree in a mall and put your money where it will truly be appreciated, all the while teaching your child about kindness. That's about it for today.

Today is write BE KINDER on the top of your feet and walk in kindness day.

Changes

I've been gone for a while. Have you missed me? So many changes happening around me, I've felt in a whirlwind of emotions and haven't been able to get my brain organized. My cousin had her breast cancer surgery and all is well. She starts chemotherapy soon. My mom is in town...Finally. Christopher is making life-changing decisions...all good. Work is forever in evolution. Whew! Finding a hard time getting my footing. Anyway, just wanted to touch base and let those of you who have been wondering whether or not I am alive...that I am. Holding my blessings close.

Today is eat Taco Time day.

Can't Wait to See Mom

Whoohooo!  Mom gets back to Arizona tomorrow. I can't wait to start making more memories and having more fun. We always laugh and share. She keeps me busy. I am so blessed. That's all for today.

Today is dress in crazy clothes and go for a walk day.

Working

Just working, working, and working so more. Don't want to bore you with what is on my mind today. But, will say I am so thankful to have a job.

Today is write the word FRIEND ten times day.

Do For Someone Else.

Just thinking about what I can do for someone else today.

Today is taste salty day.

Family for Children

Family. My has the meaning of that word changed over the years...in a wonderful way. It used to be a family meant a mom, dad, a couple kids and a pet or two. Now, there are families of all combinations. How amazing is that?! We can welcome people into our family whether they are blood or not. We call people "brother" and "sister" even though we may not have the same parents. We have families at work, athletic teams, common causes and people who bring children into their family because they don't have one of their own. Once a member of a family, you consider yourself loved, protected, and respected. You are no longer alone. How amazing is that? So many children calling adults in their loves loving parental terms. So many children calling each other sister, brother, cousin, even though there is no blood line joining them. Single parents raising children, married couples raising children, same sex couples raising children, grandparents raising grandchildren....all in the name of love and what is best for the children. As a country, we could learn from the families. Wouldn't it be nice if we love, protected and respected everyone as if they were a family member? What I would have for my family, my sons, my granddaughters is what I would wish for everyone...to be a part of a nurturing, safe, and fun environment. Family, not such a simple word anymore, but I think better.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.

Penn State. C'Mon.

Today is wear a funny hat, dance around a bucket signing "Fill it up. Fill it up." day.

Brain Overload

No blog today. My brain is on total overload from work stuff.

Today is draw snowmen and snowflakes day.

Right or Wrong Verdict

I happen to believe that Conrad Murray is guilty of causing the death of Michael Jackson. There are so many things that he did wrong under the guise of being a doctor. Perhaps this will serve as an example to other physicians who succumb to the demands of their patients rather than just saying no. If Michael Jackson was such an addict, and Murray knew it, why not get him help or simply refuse to treat him? Too many physicians get caught up in the publicity and it seems their medical ethics just disappear....for a price. I in no way believe that Murray intended to kill Michael Jackson and I believe he truly cared about him, but....his actions or lack of actions brought him to the place he is now. You know he is looking back now and thinking "I should have..." All the people that NOW claim to have known about Michael Jackson's troubles and addictions should have stepped in. They should have kidnapped him and taken him to a rehab place or something. While I believe there are many people that contributed to Michael Jackson's demise, I believe Murray is the most responsible and agree with the jury's verdict. Last night I watched "This Is It", the show that was made about the rehearsals for the final tour. I had forgotten what an amazing entertaining Michael Jackson was. His body movements and insight into music and spirit will never be able to be recreated. There is a part in the show where it is just Michael Jackson talking and pictures of the world, nature, kids, etc., being shown. He is talking about saving the planet, the children, the animals, etc. He is saying, "We keep saying They need to do something...well We are They and We need to do something...we need to love each other..We are One..." He truly was a kind and spirited soul. Although justice may have been served yesterday...Michael Jackson is still gone today and that is a sad thing.

Today is clean out the refrigerator day.

Is It Really Funny?

I've been gone for a couple days. Did ya miss me? Anyway, I don't exactly know where I've been. I had a wonderful YouTube-able fall over the top of my dogs on the sidewalk last week and have felt like I played a rough football game. I'm okay, just stiff. Makes me think about all the people that do YouTube things. It always amazes me how people getting hurt seems to draw the most attention. I saw a T shirt once that said, "It's all fun and games until somebody gets hurt...then its hilarious." I must admit, I laughed a little. But, seriously, what does that say about us? We are such a voyeuristic country. And yet, we do nothing about the problems we see. We talk and even laugh about things like Lindsay Lohan getting out of jail after only serving an hour or so of her 30 day sentence. But, the fact is, unless someone steps in we will be reading about her in real trouble....or worse. When I was at the casino the other day, a woman was sitting next to me at a machine, we were talking and enjoying ourselves. Then, her husband or boyfriend came up and started yelling at her, grabbed her shoulder. She just calmly said, "Will you just go away please?" He kept on. I looked at her and whispered, "Are you okay?" She just clenched her teeth and nodded. He kept on. I looked at him and asked if he was okay, to which he sort of leaned in and gave me a menacing look. A standoff of sorts. He left. I asked her if she was going to be okay and she said, "Yes, I'll be okay." We sat for a little while longer and then she cashed out and left. I'm kicking myself today, for not giving her my number or name or something. I don't know what I could've done, but at least she would have known I cared. My point is, some things really are Not funny. Don't ignore things you see. Do more. Be kindER.

Today is read a book together day.

Just Listen

Just listen. View from Mom and Dad's deck.

Today is wear the T shirt sticker day.

Flower Blog

Today is make up a story starting with, "The little puppy....." day.

Where Ever You Stand, Stand Strong

With all the protests and sit-ins and sit-downs and marches going on I find it inspiring to see so many people standing up for what they feel strongly about. Whether you are standing barefoot on rocks, in heels on a dance floor, in tennis shoes on a court, work boots on a mountain, or flip-flops on a beach, the important thing is is that you are standing for what you believe in. Stand strong. So many times, people feel that they don't have a voice or feel maybe that their voice simply doesn't matter. Funny how we feel stronger when we are standing in a crowd. But....the really empowering thing is when we can feel just as strong when we are standing alone.

Today is obviously trick or treat day.

Happy Birthday Christopher

Today is Christopher's birthday, 29 years old. Funny how memories come rushing back, more so on his birthday than my own. When he was little, we went through some very hard times but I used to day, "You could strip me down naked and leave me on a corner somewhere and as long as I had Christopher I'd be okay." Still holds true today, although the picture wouldn't be quite as pretty....and there would be a bigger crowd standing with me on the corner. It's amazing to look back at the hardships that were happening and have them not mean as much as the memories of the good times. The bus rides on days off to "where ever we feel like going", the wonderful stories he used to tell and the literal way of looking at things. The imaginary friend Kimberly who lived in his closet and went to the beach by herself and who made us late in the morning because she could never find her coat, the tooth fairy, the banana skateboard, the painting the bathroom wall, the pulling of a tooth in front of a policeman, his drawings and creations on all the walls, the bike rides with him sitting in the seat with a green garbage bag over him as a raincoat......  Fun to remember the growing up, grade school, high school, college, and the years in between. Now he owns his own home, has a good job, and good friends. I thanked him yesterday, on the way home from the casino, for being a nice guy, for not getting into partying or legal problems or any of those other things that cause strife. He's quiet but has a wonderful sense of humor and has an amazing way of being able to reason through things, look at all angles, and make wise decisions. We've come a long way since the picture above. Lots of hard memories, fun memories, loving memories, and learning memories. I'm so proud of the man he has become.

Today is celebrate Christopher day.

What Is Your Reaction?

I think once we figure out what our core values and beliefs are, then really there is no question how we should react to situations. If you are honest, you will have an honest reaction. If you are vindictive, then you will have a vindictive reaction. If you are defensive, then you will have a defensive reaction. If you are loving, then you will have a loving reaction. My point is, our reactions come from whatever is deeply rooted inside of us. Once we figure out what type of soil those roots are planted in, then the rest should be easy. Emphasis on the should.

Today is write CAT ten times and draw a cat day.

Corey's Picture Speaks

Corey sent me this picture. I love it! There is so much to it. The Be Kinder wristbands. A man and woman being kind to each other. A bigger person and a littler person being kind to each other. A brown person and not so brown person being kind to each other. A driver and passenger being kind to each other. We could all learn from this picture. Thank you Corey for sharing it and for sharing the wristbands.

Today is wear flowers day.

Playing Poker Versus Living Life

So, I'm thinking about poker today. I've been playing on my phone this morning and it's funny how you can get to know the other players next moves. I wonder if the way a person plays poker is reflective of how they live there life. Never fails in every game, first hand, someone has to go all in. Sometimes someone else will challenge them and maybe win. But, most often, everyone else folds. Other players play conservative and only seem to raise on what they think is a sure deal. Still others bet on the hopes that the card they need will be the next one turned. I was at a table this morning where everyone just kept checking all around the table until all cards were down, then the betting began. The pot was $4,000, which I didn't win. Interesting that we all followed someone, I'm not even sure who started the betting. Is it like that in life? We all just sit around and wait for someone else to make the first move and then, as if almost by permission, we all decide to follow....not even sure exactly where we are going? My son will laugh at me when I play a certain hand that he would have folded on. I guess sometimes I'm more of a "the next card will be the one I need" type of player. I'll never forget at a real casino, when I went all in with pocket Aces and someone beat me with three 7's. Mind you it was only $40, but still. What I thought was a sure deal, actually wasn't. I'm going to think about this for a while...about how I play poker and how I live life. It'll be interesting to see what I discover.

Today is taste something spicy day.

Movie and Shoes Day.

Spent the morning watching Brides Maids and painting shoes...late birthday shoes. No blog today. The movie was great! A little raunchy in some places but had me literally laughing out loud. On to work.

Today is listen to music and dance for 30 minutes day.

Are You a Jumper?

Think it through. So many times, we jump into things that look good from the outset and even halfway through, but then seem to go south. Then you find yourself thinking, "If I'd only known." Hindsight is an amazing thing. Some things are impossible to predict, but other things I think we see but think they will disappear or change. Have you ever been in a place and thought, "Heck, I knew I shouldn't have come here. I knew this would happen." Why do we make decisions that inside we really know they are not the best ones? Is it the challenge? Is it the expectation of change? Or, is it simple foolishness? Some say it's better to do something even if you think it may be wrong. Others think it's best to not do anything and let someone else do it. Who is right? Who is wrong? I'm of the mind that if the odds are in my favor for a good outcome, after thinking through as best I can, then I'll jump in. Has made for some disappointments but overall I've been lucky. Are you a jumper in, a jumper out, or just a jumper? Hmmmm thought-provoking.

Today is sing a song together day.

Slow Down

That's what I'm doing today. Slowing down. Not sure if the weather change is messing with my brain or what, but I'm feeling in a fog today. I'd rather be sleeping or laying on the couch watching a good movie. That's it for today. Enjoy yourself no matter what you are doing.

Today is Corey's birthday.

Today is clean for an hour day.

Sometimes It Isn't All About You.

Wow, I completely spaced out writing yesterday. Busy day. Walked and then went out to my parents house and worked on their lawn....for a long time. Mowed, mowed again, raked, watered, seeded, fertilized, watered again. Pulled weeds and sprayed weeds. It was hot. It wasn't too much fun. My mantra was "I love my parents. I love my parents. I love my parents." Lol. Sometimes we do things in our lives simply because they are the right things to do. They might be physically hard things, time-consuming things, emotionally difficult things. But we do them out of love and sacrifice. It is easy to think about yourself and put yourself first all the time, but is it the right thing? I must say my parents have told me just to let the grass go and Dad will tend to it when they get here. But, I want to make it nice and easier for them, so I do little things because I care about them. When someone asks you for a favor, big or small, if you love them then do it. You will feel better in the end and they will appreciate your kindness. Sometimes it isn't all about you.

Today is celebrate Angenee day.

Just Be Kinder

Tired today. So much in the news that is negative about people hurting each other, parents abusing kids, police killing animals, caretakers mistreating patients. It all makes me tired. My message today is simple....Just be kinder.

Today is do 20 jumping jacks, 20 pushups, and 20 situps day.

Things Will Get Better

You know you are working to hard when your back and shoulders ache from sitting at the computer. Going through changes at work that are almost working on my last nerve. I find myself physically shaking my head to get the negativity out of my brain. Positive thoughts....I have a job. I am able to pay most of my bills. I am blessed to be able to work from home. The list does go on. But, today my body is telling me to move. I absolutely love my profession and I'm really good at it, but today I am tired. Not much of a blog, more of just getting out my frustration. Things will get better. Things will get better. Things will get better. My mantra for today. Not a bad one for everyday. Whatever your struggle is...things Will get better. That's it.

Today is eat something different day.

Wizard of Oz Today

Today is a good day! What else can I say?

Today is stand outside for 5 minutes and really listen day.

Take Time to Laugh

Sometimes we get so caught up with trying to make a living we forget to enjoy the living. I'm a guilty one. I work and work and work. I worry about whether or not my check is going to cover the bills, so I work some more. I was thinking the other day, "When was the last time, I just sat on the couch and watched a movie?" I can't remember when. I don't seem to ever stop. If I've got the TV on, I'm usually doing something else, crafting, cleaning, working, etc. I also noticed that I don't laugh very often...not because I'm unhappy, but just because sometimes there's nothing to laugh about. I don't remember what show I was watching, the other night, but I laughed, I mean really laughed, by myself. The dogs looked at me funny and that made me laugh more. I realized then it had been a while. When we laugh, our body shoots off endorphins that go to our brains and make us feel good. I decided right then that, whether I'm by myself or with someone, I am going to laugh more often. When I was in college, a girlfriend and I used to lay over the sides of our beds with our hands almost touching the floor. We would look at each other and just start laughing. It felt good. Hmmm now that I think about it, it was probably our idea of a high. Lol. Anyway, my point is, even though you are working hard for the money...take a minute to laugh and jump start those endorphins that may have been quiet for a while. Enjoy!

Today is play a board game day day.

Resting My Brain

No blog today. Resting my brain.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.

Another Girl Has Simply Disappeared

Yesterday was a sad day. A few days ago, another beautiful little girl went missing. She simply disappeared. No clues. No one saw anything. Nothing left behind. No scent for the dogs to pick up. Nothing. Hundreds of volunteers and police searching the 3 mile radius around her home. Nothing. The grandmother was on TV yesterday begging whoever has her granddaughter, "Just drop her off. Just drop her off at a store, a gas station, someone's front porch. Just drop her off. She is loved and my heart is breaking." I could feel this gramma just bleeding inside. Then later a report came on about the mother's past. Apparently she had moved over from California. In California, she had served 4 years in jail for beating another child and locking her in the closet for hours at a time. There were other instances of child abuse and neglect. And yet, when she got out of jail, she still had custody of her children. What is wrong with our system?! Why did this woman have her children after all that? We should be protecting our children above all else. This makes me feel physically ill. How scared must a child be living in a situation where they don't feel safe. I've said it so many times before. God gives parents the privilege of having children. Parents need to love and protect and nurture those children. Now, to be fair, I don't know what happened to this latest 5-year-old girl. I don't know if the mother did something horrible and has hidden the child, or not. For today, I am going to hold on to the hope that some concerned and caring person knew what was going on inside their house and decided to take the girl to keep her safe. Please, please, please, if you don't do anything else with your life, protect our children. Speak up if you see something wrong. Do something. Keep speaking up and don't stop speaking until that child is safe. If we see something bad happening and do nothing about it, we are almost as guilty. Just do something. Anything is better than nothing.

Today is listen to your mom or dad tell you a good childhood story day.

A Parent's Responsibility Never Ends

I have been so blessed to be part of a family who are close, even though not by miles. We truly love, care for, and respect each other. We may not talk every day or even every week but, if one of us is in need, we all band together in a circle of support. It makes me really sad when I hear of families that aren't so. Siblings that are constantly bickering and parents that somehow get the impression that when their children get older that their responsibilities of being a parent simply stop. It's sad to me that they are missing out on the everyday things in each others lives, grandkids, etc. But...the thing that really makes me sad is when an adult child has been diagnosed with cancer and still the parent is not there. I don't pretend to know what the original strife was, or the things that have been done or said in the years that have passed. I do know that cancer trumps it all. Being a two time breast cancer survivor, I know that cancer has a way of bringing things into perspective. Suddenly the things you thought were the most important things don't really matter. The anger and petty baggage you have been carrying simply lose their hold and drop away. You appreciate more the little things and the just being able to walk around. My family was so supportive and uplifting during my surgeries, radiation, etc. The thought of going through all that without them just about makes me cry. I don't know if you are reading this or not, but you know I'm talking to you if you are. No matter who did what, said what, didn't do something, didn't say something...just does not matter anymore. At the end of the day, you are still family, you are still children, you are still parents. If you can't be there for the everyday things...then at least be there for the critical times. God gives parents the privilege of having children. It is the parents' responsibility to take care of them...regardless.

Today is write the word HAPPY twenty times day.

Teach Kindness

There is so much emphasis on "stop bullying" in schools, I wonder if the kids even hear the words anymore. They are taught not to bully. They are taught what bullying is. They are taught what to do if they see bullying. They are taught what it feels like to be bullied. Instead of always focusing on the negative horrible behaviors, why not focus on being kinder? Why not teach them how to be kinder? Why not teach them what kindness is? Why not teach them to expect kindness from each other? I wonder if kids even recognize kindness when they see it. I wonder if they could tell you what the kinder thing is to do. I wonder if you asked them to study a bullying situation, if they would be able to tell you the kinder way the situation could have been handled. Wouldn't it be nice if there was no need to punish kids who are bullying, simply because bullying was not happening? Wouldn't it be nice to reward those kids who are being kinder? Something to think about.

Today is taste something sour day.

Grass Work

Whew! I miss Oregon grass. I just spent two hours mowing and re-mowing, watering, spreading grass seed, spreading fertilizer, and watering again my lawn. Arizona is brutal on grass and soil. The ground is hard like dried clay. We have winter grass and summer grass and all kinds of grasses in between. I miss the just being able to water, when the rain wasn't doing the job, and mowing the grass. That's it. The really fun thing is, is that I get to go out and do the same thing over again at my parents' house in the next few days. Lol! Oh well, it is good for my spirit and soul to be working in the yard, feeling the dirt, smelling the grass. Somehow, my mind slows down and things come into focus while I'm working with Mother Nature. So, that's it for today. Gotta shower off all this nature and get to work. Spend a little time with Mother Nature today and see how you feel.

Today is wear a funny hat and dance around a bucket and sing "Fill it up! Fill it up!" day.

Do What Makes You Happy

Today is a good day to do what makes you happy. Sometimes, we sacrifice our own happiness for that of others.....which is a good thing too. But, sometimes, we have to do what we want to do and what makes us happy. If it's sleeping in, then do it. If it's eating cake for breakfast, then eat it. If it's watching a favorite show or movie, then watch it. If there is something that you have always wanted to do but have never made the time, then make the time. You never know what tomorrow will bring.

Today is count and write to fifty day.

Check In With Breast Cancer Survivors

Getting ready to walk with my sister on the phone in Oregon. Today is the breast cancer walk in downtown Phoenix. It's an amazing experience, but I have to work so can't take the time to drive down, walk and drive home. So, we'll have our own private breast cancer walk. I love my ear piece for the phone. Missed writing yesterday because I spent the morning at the casino with a neighbor friend. Found an awesome machine and came home with an extra $100 in my wallet. Whoohoo! Whatever you do today, enjoy yourself. If you have a friend or family member that has had breast cancer or has breast cancer, today would be a good day to check in with them. Just let them know you're thinking of them. Well, that's all I've got for now.

Today is clean for an hour day.

Ellen's Closet

Gotta work today, but wanted to share this pic. You all know I've been waiting to hear whether or not Ellen got my BE KINDER shoes. Well, this month's Architecture Digest is featuring Ellen and Portia's home. Imagine my surprise when I saw the pic of her shoes closet. Whooohooo! Lol. This is called positive thinking.

Today is find out how many licks it takes to reach the chocolate inside a lollipop day.

"Overall" Opportunities.

I believe that people are brought into our lives for a reason. Whether it be to help you in some way or for you to help them in some way. I wonder how many times I have missed an awesome experience because I was not seeing what was in front of me. Maybe that person who smiled at me in the grocery store owns a billboard company and would've given me a good deal on BE KINDER billboards. Maybe the woman who seemed sad as I passed her on my walk yesterday needed something more than a "Good Morning". Maybe the person who I cut short in a political conversation is going to be the president some day. It's really wild to think about how one simple interaction can change the universe. For example, if I have a BE KINDER conversation with someone and they go home and find the house a mess or child drawings on the wall, maybe our conversation will have made a difference in how they handle their child. If you stop and help someone put groceries in the car or hand them something they've dropped, will they be more quick to help someone they see in need? There are so many opportunities that we have every single day to make a difference. Thomas Edison said, "Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." I love that. The harder something may seem to be, the less likely we are to do it. Why not, for today, be open to those people and opportunities that come your way. It could be life-changing.

Today is draw 10 rainbows and 10 pots of gold day.

Successful

I read a wonderful quote this morning by David Thomas. "My list of ingredients for success is divided into four basic groups: Inward, Outward, Upward, and Onward." Very thought-provoking for me. We all measure success by different standards. Some feel the more money and more stuff you have, the more successful you are. Some feel the more friends and more followers you have, the more successful you are. Some feel the bigger house and fancier car you have, the more successful you are. We all want more money and more stuff. But, I wonder if that would make us feel internally more successful. By definition, successful means achieving or having achieved success; having attained wealth, position, honors, or the like. Nothing in that definition talks about the feeling of being successful. I believe, success is measured by how good you feel about where you have been, where you are and where you are going. When I look back at my life and how I lived it, I can see where I have been a helpful, positive person and that makes me feel successful. I see my family and how much we respect and love each other and that makes me feel successful. I see changes that have happened because of something I've done or said and that makes me feel successful. I don't have any regrets...except maybe one...and that makes me feel successful. I may not have lots of money, or lots of stuff, but I have the things that really matter and that, to me, is being successful. At the end of the day, whatever your idea of success is, I hope you are achieving it.

Today is look for green day.

Accepting Changes

Another day. Finally, cooling off in Arizona. I love the heat and the sun but, after a really, really long summer, I sure appreciate being able to open the windows and doors to let the fresh air in. As I sit here, outside my window, I can see my flag waving in the breeze. Funny how a simple change in weather affects the way I feel. Change. I believe that it is not the changes around us that cause us to feel a certain way, but rather the way we accept or don't accept those changes. My sister has an amazing way of seeing something good in absolutely everything. I'm pretty good at it too, but it sometimes takes me a little while to get there. I like my routine. When something happens to change that, I tend to resist the change. Once I get to the point where I can accept the change, then I can begin to see the positives in it. I just wish that process could be a little quicker sometimes. Lol. For today, I'm going to work hard on seeing the good in the changes happening in my life and my space. I'm going to focus on how I can benefit from them. I'm going to accept the changes for what they are and move forward in a positive light, thereby brightening my mood and the world around me.

Today is read a book together day.

Compensation

So, I'm tired today. Worked 101 hours over the past 2 weeks. Whew! Brings up the question...Does anyone ever really feel that they are paid what they're worth? I suppose, if you don't like your job the obvious answer would be no. But, for those of us who love what they do and actually look forward to working, the answer should be yes, or "it doesn't matter". Lol. Wouldn't it be awesome if we could all work in the field we are entirely passionate about and actually be able to make a living? If that were true, I'd paint shoes all day, work on puzzles, write, put up BE KINDER billboards every where, take my BE KINDER mission to the schools as a resident artist, go to the casino, travel, and sleep. I wonder if those people who are independently wealthy truly enjoy their lives and what they spend their time doing. I wonder if I didn't have to carve out time to do my "passionate" things if I would enjoy them as much. I think it's important to spend at least a little time each day doing what you find emotionally satisfying, whether or not you are being compensated. I feel a sense of peace and abandonment when I am creating, like for just a few minutes all the other "stuff" just doesn't matter. What are you passionate about?

Today is count and write to 50 day.

Missing Old Halloweens

With the stores filled with Halloween decorations and kids picking out their costumes my mind is filled with memories. I remember all the homemade costumes. They seemed to be so much more creative than the ones we can buy in the stores now. I remember Mom sewing and all of us putting on makeup and helping each other get ready. We would take pillow cases or paper bags to collect our treats. Not these fancy colorful plastic bags that rip and definitely don't hold as much candy. I remember looking forward to going to certain houses because they always had the best treats. Ann Johns and her homemade popcorn balls. Others with cookies, brownies and caramel apples. We would leave the house and our parents never had to worry about whether or not we would come home safe. We ate candy along the way without having to worry if someone had poisoned it in some way. The only thing we had to be afraid of was whether or not the neighbor's dog Moe was out. We also trick or treated for Unicef. When we got home, we spilled our candy out on the floor or table and the trading game began. The only candy we didn't eat was the candy that was unwrapped. Not now. When kids come to my door, there is always a parent or two standing behind them. The costumes are fancier and brighter, but not different than the kids that came before. People are giving out stickers, pencils and granola packets. When the kids get home, undoubtedly, the parents meticulously go through their candy, throwing out some of the best things simply because they didn't know the people they got them from. It's sad to me that the progression and changes in times have made us less creative, less trusting, less fun perhaps. I wonder if our kids and grandkids know what they are missing.

Today is clean for an hour day.

A Good Day

Sort of overcast here in Arizona today. It is a good day to take a break.

Someone You Know Has Cancer. What Now?

So, someone you know has been diagnosed with breast cancer. What next? I had a conversation this morning with someone who was just recently diagnosed with breast cancer. Fortunately I was able to help her, support her, advise her, and just listen. I say fortunately, because I have been on that journey twice before. Anyway, having the conversation, reminded me of how uncomfortable different people were around me once they found out I had breast cancer. They didn't know how to act or what to say. Of course, me being my verbal and open self, I was able to let them know what I needed or didn't need from them. So, my advice to those people who are in that place is to simply ask the person with cancer what they want and need. Do you want to talk about it? Do you want me to ask questions? Do you want me to help you in any way? Do you want me to pray for you and add you to prayer lists? Do you want me to help you gather the latest medical information? Do you want me to just sit here? Do you want me to just listen? Do you want me to leave you alone? Do you want me to shave my head? My point is, rather than spend time and energy worrying about saying or doing the wrong thing, simply ask. The person with cancer will appreciate your straightforwardness and honesty in asking. Cancer has a way of really bringing the things that are important in your life to the forefront. Have honest, heartfelt conversations. Admit you are afraid. Admit you are sad. Admit that you are angry. Admit you are thankful it isn't you. Cancer is ugly, scary, and sometimes unpredictable. Once we acknowledge that, we can get down to fighting it and taking one appointment at a time. So, again, simply ask the person with cancer what they need or want from you and then do it, give it, say it, or be it.

Today is wear a star sticker day.

Suggestions?

So, I'm looking for input. I'm so excited about Nic and Kristen and their enthusiasm about the BE KINDER mission, wristbands, etc. They are high school kids that are proving that it is cool to be kind. They have passed out and continue to pass out wristbands...about 300 or so. That's amazing! Nic thinks I need to have a fan page on Facebook so people can post pics and comments. I'm going to try to get that done this weekend. Where I need the input from you is on ideas or suggestions you may have that I can do to increase the amount of people looking at my blog, commenting on the blog, and leaving their own stories. On my website bekinder.net there is a tab that says BE KINDER STORIES. It is my hope that people will start writing there and sharing. I've had offers to advertise on my site, but I really don't want to have the people that visit it to be bombarded with miscellaneous ads. I put a daily BE KINDER thought on Facebook and also Tweet a daily thought. The problem is, I don't have very many "friends"...lol. My niece Mariah just texted me that she is going to put a link on her Facebook page. Whoohoo! I would so appreciate any suggestions you may have. If you want wristbands, let me know. Thank you in advance for being kinder and helping me out.

Today is wear brown day.

Michael Jackson versus Conrad Murray

So, I'm promising myself that I am not going to get wrapped up in the Conrad Murray/Michael Jackson trial...but...I must say...Before yesterday I felt that Murray had just made a horrible mistake that resulted in Jackson's death. I actually felt a little bit sorry for him and the place he has found himself in. Then, yesterday, too many things that were said have completely changed my mind. Murray ordered 4 gallons of propofol in the span of about 4 months. Murray left Jackson alone with no monitoring equipment...to talk on the phone, email, use the bathroom, etc. Murray found Jackson not breathing while he was on the phone talking to a woman and did not tell her to call 911. Murray called Jackson's assistant and told him to come to the house immediately and did not tell him to call 911. When the assistant got there Murray had him help collect all the vials and syringes of medications and put them in a bag. The assistant called 911. Murray performed CPR with 1 hand and on the bed, instead of 2 hands on the floor. Murray did not tell EMS about the propofol when specifically asked what Jackson had been given. Murray did not tell the ER doctors about the propofol when specifically asked what Jackson had been given. Besides all that, there are drugs that can be given to reverse the effects of propofol and there were none in the house. The final straw for me was when Murray's attorney announced that Michael Jackson had given himself an overdose when Murray was out of the room. That made me angry. Not because it was Michael Jackson and not because it was Conrad Murray, but because it was a supposed doctor blaming a dead patient for his own death and not accepting an ounce of responsibility for his part in the tragedy. Yes, Jackson was probably an addict, but Murray touts himself as being a physician and should have either gotten Jackson some help or completely refused to treat him. As far as I am concerned, Murray made so many medical, ethical, and morally wrong decisions that he needs to be held accountable.

Today is help cook dinner and clean the kitchen day.

Thankful to Have a Job

Busy, hectic day today. Trying to master the changes at work. Not much on my brain but that. Except, being extremely thankful that I have a job and a career that I absolutely love. So, that's my mantra today...Thank you for allowing me to work in a profession that I love.

Today is draw 10 butterflies day.

30 minutes

Today is a good day. It is finally starting to cool off a bit in Arizona. Nice morning walk with the neighbor and our dogs. Lots of rabbits, birds, and nature. Nice to come home not sweating for a change. We've been going through a lot of changes at work lately and try as I might to be positive, I was getting a bit frustrated and nervous. Enter Jennifer, today's life saver. I won't bore you with all the details, but this gal is amazing. She showed me short-cuts to help with the new system and get me back up to speed. Whoohoo! It is amazing what 30 minutes on the phone has done to adjust my attitude. Makes me wonder was the best way to spend 30 minutes helping someone else would be today. I better get busy!

Today is play outside together for 30 minutes day.

We Have Got To Do Something

Someone asked me the other day what I thought about Susan Powell's father-in-law being arrested. I had to ask her who Susan Powell was. For those of you who don't know, she is the woman who disappeared in North Dakota when her husband had taken their two sons camping in the snow. I told her I remembered the story. I told her that with all the missing and murdered children and adults, throw in a few politicians and celebrity scandals, I have a hard time keeping everyone straight. How many times do we hear about the frantic search for someone on the news or on-line, and then we hear nothing about whether or not they were ever found. Does that mean that they weren't found? Does it mean someone else got away with something horrific? Does it mean they were never truly missing? I'm sure the people directly involved are either really happy or really devastated. I tend to get emotionally invested in the missing, abused and murdered children and have written about them before in my much earlier blogs. We have got to do something. We have got to be paying attention. There is always someone who has seen something. There is always someone who knows something. There is no reason that any child should be missing. There is no reason that any child should be abused. There is no reason that any child should be murdered. Same is true for adults. We have got to do something. I'm at a loss.

Today is clean for an hour day.

Enjoy The Time

Short blog today. Going to spend the day with Christopher. Bike jumps, casino, and probably a meal. Doesn't really matter what we do...I just really enjoy the time and try to make the most of every moment. This is what memories are made of. Enjoy the time you spend today.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.

Food and Song Memories

Funny how tasting a certain food or hearing a certain song can transport your mind back to an exact moment in time. Homemade ice cream reminds me of making ice cream in the backyard in Lakeview, the rock salt, the taking turns turning the handle and how it would get harder and harder to turn, then Dad would take over. It seemed to melt quicker than store bought ice cream. Goulash, scalloped potatoes, popcorn balls (Christmas and Halloween), pulled taffy (birthday parties), blond brownies (Mom's Bridge night), Jello-O with homemade whipped cream, Wheaties with cream from the top of the glass milk container that was delivered. Fortunately, my food memories are good ones. Are yours? Peter Frampton, Heart (concert with Dad), Michael Jackson, Whispers, Teddy Pendergrass (college), Hotel California (dentist, bad memory), John Denver, James Taylor, and Carol King. Talk about flashbacks. With all the memories we have, it is amazing how a simple thing can prompt our brains so quickly. I wonder what kind of memories we are making for our children and grandchildren. Will they remember food you cooked for them? Songs you listened to and sang with them? Will they be happy memories? I wonder.

Today is eat Taco Time Day.

Celebrity Obsession

Just sitting here wondering what our obsession with celebrity gossip is representative of. I almost feel sorry for half of them that just want to live their lives and entertain us, but don't want to be our best friends. Can you imagine if your neighbors or coworkers felt they deserved an explanation for everything you did in your life, the conversations you had or didn't have, the relationships you had or didn't have; or tweeted or Facebook'd every time you went shopping along with a complete analysis of what you bought, wore, ate, etc. Pretty scary. Almost makes me more acutely aware of what I'm doing out "there". Just for today, pretend everything you do, wear, say, and eat will be known by everyone. Will you change anything for tomorrow?

Today is taste warm bread day.

International Day of Peace

Today is International Day of Peace. Makes me think of internal peace. Internal as in inside of me. Internal as in inside of my personal space. We can aspire for international peace, but if we don't have peace within ourselves, our families, our communities, how can we possibly think we can achieve it internationally? I feel mostly at peace with myself, but do have my moments of turmoil. I feel at peace in the midst of my family. Community? I'm not quite sure. I feel at peace inside my home in my community and in my immediate surroundings, but I'm not sure about further out. As I write this, I'm thinking that trust is a big part of peace. Do I trust those "outside"? I'd like to, but.... Same goes, I suppose, for other countries. Then we must realize too that my idea of peace may not be the same as yours, our idea of peace may not be the same as theirs. Rambling, I know. I guess, I'll just focus on my internal peace and the peace around me and hopefully if enough people are doing the same then eventually all our "peaces" will blend together and thus...international peace. Hmmm, nice something to ponder.

Today is sit in a circle and giggle and laugh day.

Family Memories

Whoohoo! My mom got her ticket to come back to Arizona in November. They have a wonderful cabin on the Kenai River in Alaska where they live from April to November or December and then come to their place in Arizona the other part of the year. Every year I look so forward to have them here. They keep me busy. Walks with dad and a baseball game or two, quiet conversations. Movies, board games, shopping, and memory-making moments with mom. Lots of laughter. I am so blessed to be able to spend time with them and am so thankful for the relationships we have. There are so many families that are broken, so much animosity and anger, so many lost loved ones. At the end of the day, what really matters? I've never heard anyone say, "I wish I wouldn't have been as close with my family. I regret all the time and moments I spent with my parents or children. I wish I would've seen more faults. I wish I wouldn't have been so nice. I wish I would've spent more holidays alone." My point is, if there are unresolved issues or tension in your family, maybe it's time you fixed them. Not only will you enjoy the moments you spend now, but the memories will be so much more rewarding than the guilt for not having done or said things you wish you would have. As for me...I will continue to love and appreciate mine.

Today is write the word "love" ten times day.

Love Ya Habit

Last week my sister was telling me about listening to a particular speaker who was taking about how we need to put the "I" back in "I love you". Since then, I am acutely aware of how many times I say or text "love ya", almost as if a habit. So, I've started to say "I love you" with a more "definitely" tone of voice. It feels better to me. I think we get into a comfortable habit with people we love or live with where we just go through the motions. We assume they know we love them. We assume they know they can count on us. We assume they know how much they mean to us. We assume they feel the same about ourselves. When was the last time, you actually had a conversation with your partner, child, parent, friend, etc., about how much it means to you to have them in your life? When was the last time someone told you how much you mean to them? For today, why not start a conversation with someone about how much they mean to you? You might be surprised how good it makes you both feel. Don't assume people know how you truly feel about them. Put voice to those feelings and let them know.

Today is hug each other and say I love you day.

Overtime

This is actually for Sunday, time clock is messed up.

I'm being kinder to my bank account today by working overtime.

Today is clean for 1 hour day.

Unexpected Surprises

I think unexpected surprises are the best kind. Whether you are on the giving end or the receiving end. Last night my son surprised me with a beautiful silver charm bracelet with bird, peace sign, cancer ribbon, stars and moons and suns, and Gramma green and orange and blue beads. It is gorgeous and soooo me. I absolutely don't think the cost of a gift matters, but...if you know my son, you know how hard it is for him to spend money. So, in this case, it means even more...if that makes sense. (smile). His friend helped him pick out everything and asked what color scheme I liked and he said "all colors", which is so true. He knows I love birds and peace and Gramma green. The pink cancer ribbon is a no-brainer. The stars and moons and suns are also important things to me. My point is, the more personal and thought-full a gift is, the more touched a person is when they receive it. We can all go out and buy the latest gadget or expensive jewelry or something that basically says "it's your birthday so I got you a present". But, when someone takes the time to really think about the person they are giving the gift to, it means so, so much more. Thank you, Bud, I love my surprise.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.

Take a Breath

A little late today. Busy, busy. Left the casino with more money than I went with, laid in the sun with my Friday afternoon friend and now getting ready to work. I like days like this. It's nice to get away from the TV and computer every once in a while. Not too much on my mind, but relaxing, something I don't seem to do enough. We all seem to be moving so fast through our days and weeks. It's nice to stop and take a breath every now and then. That's it.

Today is sit in a circle and make up a story that begins with...The gray cat...day.

A Different Sort of Birthday

Today is the birthday of an amazing woman I never met. I will light a candle and sing Happy Birthday to her. I will reread letters and remember thoughts and plans we had. I will celebrate her with love and have conversations with her in my mind, confident she is hearing my words. I will thank her for everything she did for me and mine. I will, once again, thank God for bringing her into my life when He did.

That's all for today.

Today is celebrate Faye day.

Slow Down The Swirling in Your Mind

I'm tired today. I don't know if it is the change in weather from hotter and dry to hot and humid or what. Anyway, nothing specific on my mind today, but thoughts are swirling around in a frenetic way. Do you ever feel that you are so busy simply because you have so much going on in your head, and yet physically you aren't doing anything. It's exhausting. It's amazing how fast a mind can race from one topic to another. For example...need to pay the bills, need to go to the store, need to vacuum, need to start a load of laundry, man my windows need washing, it's hot, need to answer emails and blog, need to eat, a nap sounds good, need to get ready for work...Whew! Making lists helps sometimes. Not only do you keep things organized, but you get the bonus feeling as you check them off. I try to BE KINDER to myself and breathe deep and allow my brain to slow down to a more manageable pace. If you think of all those things swirling around in your mind as slowing down, they are still swirling but not as fast, then it seems that the most important things become more clear, some of the others just disappear, and you don't feel so out of control. So, today, if you are feeling overwhelmed, just stop, close your eyes, focus on those things swirling around in your mind and breathe, slow down the swirl and you will be able to focus on what is truly most important.

Today is touch something slippery day.

Act & Observe Kindness

So, I found this awesome app on my IPhone.  I've just gotta share it.  It's actually called "AOK". The picture is a red circle with a white hand inside making the OK sign.  Anyway, you sign in and then you can see all these acts and observations of kindness. If you look at the pic above, the first line says "Submit an AOK".  Click on this and you can tell about the act of kindness you did or an act of kindness you observed.  The "View AOKs" lets you see a list of all the observations and acts of kindness that others have submitted.  The "View Map" shows a map of the United States, Canada, and Mexico and all these little raindrop things drop down and show where acts or observations of kindness are taking place.  It is amazing!  The "My Impact" is a page that sort of keeps a tally of the acts and observations you have made. There is also something called a flashtag that I haven't figured out yet. The "FAQ" is simply that. Tells about the program. I added an observation to my Impact today when Felix at Safeway pulled me away from a tower of ice cream containers that would have fallen on my bare toes had I opened the refrigerator. Thank you Felix!  Anyway, that's it for today. I'd love to hear from anyone who downloads the app and has fun with it. Just another way to encourage the BE KINDER attitude.

Today is write Tayo or Dad ten times and compliment him day.

Routine Or Rut?

As I got up this morning, petted the dogs, and meandered my way to the kitchen to get my coffee going, I realized how comfortable my routine is for me. Let the dogs out, turn on CNN, feed the cats, turn on computers, let the dogs back in, feed the dogs, check on emails and work, answer emails, make the bed, and finally get that cup of coffee. So much done in the first few minutes of the day. Routines can be good things or they can be ruts. I enjoy mine. Do you enjoy yours? If you don't like the way things are in your world, change it. Sometimes even changing a little thing will make a big difference. Whether its driving a different way to work, moving furniture around, changing a hair style, or the way you greet people. Attitude is everything. I think if we enjoy our personal routines it shows in our faces and actions. We all know people who, the second you see them, you know they are unhappy. I bet, the thing that they are unhappy about, they could change...if not the situation, their attitude towards it. Some people simply choose to be unhappy.  As for me, I love my routine. I find comfort in knowing how I'm going to start my day. As long as I am content with where I am, the bumps in the road seem a little bit easier to handle. I guess I'm saying, I'd rather be happy with my routine than unhappy in a rut. How about you?

Today is wear a funny hat, dance around a bucket singing "fill it up, fill it up" under the full moon day.

Remember The Being Kinder?

September 11, 2001.  We all remember the horrific events of that day, where we were, where our family and friends were.  So much emotion that I have no words.  The faces of people simply in shock.  I seemed to cry all the time.  I also remember in the weeks and months following how much kinder people were to each other.  We were all a little more patient, a little less dramatic, and a whole lot more patriotic.  I don't know when that all disappeared, but it seemed to just fade away. Maybe today on the ten year anniversary, we will be reminded of all that was lost, but also of how much more intimate and friendly as a country we became.  That's about it, like I said, I have no words to describe the emotions around my feelings of that day, only that I wish we could get back to where we were following...being kinder to each other.

On a much brighter note...my granddaughter Jayda turns 4 today, so there is a celebration of a wonderful, amazing, spirited child today also.

Today is celebrate Jayda day.

The Choices We Make

I'm thinking about consequences today.  I think about 5% of the things that happen in our lives we have no control over and 95% we are in absolute complete control of.  Everything we do, think, say, and feel is our choice.  It's easy to try and place blame on something or someone else if things are not going the way we want in our lives.  Why is it we can take credit for all the good things and yet not accept responsibility for the bad things?  We choose to speak the words that come out of our mouths.  We choose the people we want to spend time with.  We choose where we want to go and what we want to do.  We choose every single one of our actions.  At any given moment, ask yourself, "How did I get here?"  Whether it is a good place or a bad place, chances are if you think long enough and honestly enough, you will remember the choice you made that put you in this place.  We choose how we react to things and people.  We choose how we feel.  So often we hear "you made me feel...he made me feel...she made me feel".  No, that person did not Make you feel anything.  You chose how to react to what they said or did.  Get it?  Anyway, I just wanted to write a quickie to remind everyone that the consequences in your lives are usually a direct result of some choice you made somewhere along the line.  Take responsibility for your choices whether they be good or bad.  It is amazing how good it feels to know you are in control of what happens in your life...at least 95% of the time.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.

Get Involved

How many times have you been in a situation to see some sort of injustice taking place?  Did you do anything?  Did you say anything?  It seems like the news is riddled with people abusing and killing each other, stealing, etc., and inevitably there are people that come out and say things like, "I knew it was just a matter of time...that poor little girl had bruises all the time...I saw him torturing his dog...I heard her screaming all the time...Everyone knew it was going on."  There is always someone who has seen or heard something and chose to do nothing, to not get involved.  I wonder if they carry any guilt for knowing they perhaps could have prevented the tragedy and shattered hearts.  I think it's because people don't want to get involved.  But, if you see or hear something, aren't you already involved?  Like Oprah said, "Once you see something, you can't un-see it."  Personally, I would rather choose to get involved and perhaps save someone, than worry about "it's none of my business".  As far as I'm concerned, if something happens in my space, then it is my business. We need to be more involved.  We need to be more aware.  We need to be more concerned with the safety and happiness that swirls around us.  If you know a child is being abused, tell someone.  If you know a person is abusing animals, tell someone.  If you know someone is being unfaithful to their partner, tell them if they don't tell their partner you will.  If you hear screaming or threats, tell someone.  If you know someone is stealing, then tell someone.  I guess my point is, get involved, help those who seem to be unable to help themselves.  I promise getting involved will be easier to live with than the guilt you may feel if you knew something bad was happening and did nothing about it.  Besides, it is simply the kinder thing to do. 

Today is make Jayda birthday cards day.

Be In The Moment

Today, I'm trying to be more in the moment.  Problem is, at this moment my mind is sort of blank.  Ha! But, if I write about this moment, I would say....The ceiling fan feels awesome.  The doves in the bird feeder outside my office window always make me smile.  The dogs on their beds next to my desk look so comfortable.  My desk is a mess.  Being in the moment sometimes brings about our recognition of simple miracles.  Like the fact that I'm sitting in Arizona and my sister is texting me from Oregon sending me writing inspirations.  Waiting....  Okay, here goes.  It is amazing how many things we can see and feel in any given moment, things we take for granted, things we may have missed until today.  Sort of a meditation in a way, forgetting all the troubles and stresses that may be whirling around you and focusing on what is happening right now.  I'm breathing. The sun is bright and hot outside.  The doves are enjoying breakfast and a bath.  The dogs are dreaming.  I hear a faint tinkle from the windchimes above my desk and a paper being blown by the fan.  My right foot sort of hurts.  I absolutely love the taste of hot Starbucks coffee with cream and sugar.  My tattoo looks lighter when my arm is tan.  Why do I have so many pens on my desk?  I can't believe it's Thursday already.  Phone rings and snaps me back to my reality.  Okay, so I know this is rambling and almost frenetic, but I'm trying to prove a point.  If we can be more in the moment, each moment, then sometimes the things that seem insurmountable in our lives will become less so.  Pick a moment or two today and stop, really pay attention to what is happening around you, what you are feeling.  Are you happy with what you see and feel? 

Today is touch something squishy day.

Be Kinder To Service Providers

As I sit here trying to think of what to write today, I can hear the garbage truck making its rounds through the neighborhood. I wonder if the driver feels appreciated.  So, now I'm thinking about how sometimes we forget to thank the service people we encounter every day.  A pet peeve I have is when people are talking on their cell phone while getting checked out at a grocery store.  The checker is smiling and trying to make conversation and the person on the phone is simply dismissing her.  Same thing at the bank, the post office, and the nail salon.  Are we so electronically connected that we have lost our ability to communicate with those right in front of us?  I wonder how those people who are being ignored are feeling...a little inferior perhaps?  I wonder how those people on the cell phones are feeling...a little superior perhaps?  I wonder what kind of an impact a little friendly conversation would have on those that are providing a service to us.  I wonder how often they are thanked, not in a habit sort of way but in a way where you really look at them in their face and say, "Thank you.  I really appreciate your helping me today."  The next time someone is providing you a service, look at them in their eyes and offer sincere words of kindness and thankfulness.  I wonder if you will feel the difference in their demeanor....and perhaps your own.

Today is wear yellow day.

Teach Our Children Kindness

As all of our children and grandchildren head back to school, they are on their ways to new adventures, new friends, new lessons.  There has been a lot of attention paid to bullying and the effects of bullying, which are all negative.  I wonder if there would be a difference if instead we taught our children about kindness.  I think they probably all know what bullying looks like and what it feels like when they see it or feel it.  But, I wonder how many of those children know what kindness is, what it looks like and what it feels like to see it or feel it.  So often we react and punish only when children are bad, often without explaining to them why they are in trouble or discussing what happened.  Isn't it our responsibility to teach our children the right and kinder things to do?  Isn't it our responsibility to teach our children how to treat everyone with respect and fairness?  Isn't it our responsibility to teach our children by example?  When our children get in trouble, I think it is our responsibility to make sure they understand why they're in trouble and I also think it would serve them best if we help them to think of different ways to stay out of trouble...the kinder way.  Whether kindness to another student, a teacher, a bus driver, a parent, or themselves....I think if we talk about kindness with our children, they will be able to recognize it when they see it and hopefully choose kindness over bullying every time.

Today is sing the ABCs ten times day.

Do It With Kindness

Not too much happening in my world today, which is a good thing.  I'm making another pair of shoes for my granddaughter Jayda.  As I paint the BE KINDER on them, the rainbow, hearts, and sparkles, I think of her and all the good things I want for her. I would like to think that I am painting peace and happiness into the shoes so that when they are on her feet she will feel good things.  Reminds me of a prayer shawl a woman made for me when I was diagnosed with breast cancer the first time.  There is a group of women that make these shawls.  They light candles and say prayers of healing, peace, and all good things while they knit, weaving all their prayers into the pattern.  I believe it works.  While I was going through radiation, etc., I would wrap that shawl around my shoulders and immediately felt healing happening.  I still wrap it around me when I'm needing a little inner warmth and healing.  I believe that whatever we put into things it what we will get out of them...whether its things we create, jobs we do, or thoughts we have.  I believe if we do things with kindness, then kindness will come from them.

Today is buy a plant and take care of it day.

Different Places

So, I'm a little frustrated this morning.  I forget sometimes that even though My mission is to BE KINDER in my actions and my words, others may not be in the same place.  I don't know why I'm always surprised when I come across people who refuse to take responsibility for things they have done or said and instead try to manipulate others into feeling like They are in the wrong.  Manipulation is almost a tangible thing, something you can see and feel as it is happening and yet its difficult to stop...especially while trying to BE KINDER.  I may be coming from a good place, but if the other person is not comfortable with where they are and perhaps feeling guilty, then the conversation can quickly turn into a literal battle of words.  I find these types of conversations exhausting.  How often, when these things happen, can you look back and find the choice someone made in a split second that determined what is happening right at this moment.  I guess the trick is is to be able to make a choice in any moment and be prepared to accept Whatever consequences that eventually come your way as a direct result of that choice.  I know this is a rambling blog, but I've worked through my frustration and am giving it up as of this moment.  I know that the choices and actions that I have made and done in this particular situation were the only ones I could have logically made given the information I had.  I will continue to live my life from a kinder place and accept whatever consequences come my way.

Today is clean for an hour day.

BE KINDER.

Sometimes Nothing Is More

Sometimes being kinder is not saying or doing anything at all, but rather just being.  When a friend is going through a hard time and calls to talk, sometimes they don't need anything but to vent and feel like someone is listening with care.  You may feel the need to jump in and offer advice, opinions, or solutions.  You may feel the need to fix everything for them.  You may feel the need to disagree with their perception of their hard time.  You may feel they are justified.  You may feel they are worrying over something meaningless.  However, what they may need from you is nothing more than your ear or shoulder.  Sometimes the kindest thing you can do is nothing at all.  The trick is to recognize those sometimes for what they are.

Today is Skype with Gramma day.

BE KINDER.

The Power of A Few Words

We need to BE KINDER with our words.  How many times have you said something and wished you could've said it differently or perhaps not at all.  By the same token, have you had someone say something to you that has hurt you in some way, only to have them apologize or try to say it differently to not make you feel bad?  It's funny, well not really, how sometimes we say more than we need to....you know, those little digs that simply serve no purpose at all. We all choose the words we speak and the tone in which they are spoken.  The next time you are in a situation where you feel the need to express your maybe notsohappy feelings, think about your words and ask yourself what is the kindest way to get your point across.  If we choose our words in kindness, they will be received in kindness and can make an uncomfortable or unhappy situation better.

Today is say nursery rhymes together day.

Quick resolutions

Good Morning!  Just a thought.  Another way we can be kinder to ourselves is to resolve things quickly.  If something has happened that has upset you or you have negative thoughts that you can't seem to shake, the best thing you can do for yourself is resolve them quickly.  We spend so much time carrying around energy-consuming unresolved issues that we feel busier and more frantic than we actually are.  I spent the last 12 hours stewing about a situation, trying to make sense, trying to reason, trying to excuse.  Finally, I called the people I needed to who resolved one part, then called another person and we talked and resolved the other part. Whew! I actually feel lighter than I did a couple hours ago.  Amazing how carrying around unresolved issues can bear down on your shoulders and spirit.  So, BE KINDER to yourself and work on quick resolutions to things you have been carrying.  I promise you will appreciate the lighter load.

Today is go for a walk and collect leaves day.

BE KINDER.

BE KINDER daily blog beginning

August 31, 2011

Hi again. I hope everything is as it should be in your lives. If you are not happy, then change it.

So, I'm still on my BE KINDER mission. I've had so much fun wearing my shoes and wristbands and interacting with the people who ask about them. I like to think our conversations have a ripple effect throughout the day. I wear 5 wristbands every day and try to give away at least 1 a day. Yesterday, I left 5 in the examination room at my doctor's office. I've left them in convertible cars and grocery store aisles. I've given them away to be given away. Which reminds me, I'd love to see pics of you in your shoes or wristbands. I'm going to eventually put up a page with BE KINDER moments.

My sister and I have started writing each day. She is writing "Love is..." and I'm writing "Kindness is...". The idea is that we recognize love and kindness at least once a day. I've noticed some days are filled with kindness, others not so much. It's fun to be aware though, and surprises are nice.

I've been thinking... We seem to spend more time being kind to our family, friends, neighbors, and even strangers than we do for ourselves. Don't get me wrong, kindness in any form is a good thing. But, being kind to ourselves is important too. This is a classic "do as I say and not as I do" situation, for I am definitely kinder to others than I am to myself...even my dogs fair better than me sometimes. So, as of this moment, why don't we all try to be kinder to ourselves TOO. Here are a few ideas floating in my mind:

*Write yourself a thank-you note for something you've done, i.e., cleaned the house, washed the car, walked the dog, etc.
*Eat Your favorite food for a change.
*Buy Yourself flowers.
*Leave a voice mail for yourself telling you how much you love and appreciate you.
*Put sticky notes up with compliments where you can see them throughout the day.
*Write down at least 3 good things you did today. (Good idea for every day.)
*Forgive yourself and forget it.
*Decline an invitation if you really don't want to go.
*Do something fun every day.

I'm sure you can think of others. Regarding the "do something fun every day", I made a calendar for my granddaughters where I wrote something fun for them to do every day. It's been wonderful watching videos and getting pictures of their adventures.

My amazing website gal, Beckie, showed me how to blog on this site, so please click the BLOG tab. My plan is to start the day with a BE KINDER thought or story. I would love to have some feedback and hear your thoughts and stories. I'll add the daily granddaughter things, in case you're interested. I'm also starting to tweet and will be adding thoughts there as well. Only 13 followers today, but that's a start. My Twitter name is saverynaz.

Well, that's it for now. Thank you so much for visiting the site, for your comments, and for your interest. I truly appreciate it and You. Together we can make this world a kinder place, one BE KINDER at a time.


BE KINDER.

Responsibility To Children

It's been a while.  I've been busy with life and honestly just haven't felt inspired to write.  Now I am.

My second beautiful granddaughter was born on March 27th.  I went to Portland for a visit and her mom brought her to Arizona for my birthday weekend.  I can't begin to describe the emotions I'm filled with when I am holding her or even just watching her sleep.  My mind wanders....

This picture shows gramma and granddaughter looking up at the stars on one of my favorite windchimes.  Makes me think about all I want for her.  I want her to always be looking up, always looking at the stars and always knowing the wishes and the dreams she dares to hope for are hers simply because she was born. 

As grandparents and parents, aunts and uncles, brothers and sisters we have an inherent responsibility to the children in our lives.  We must provide them with safe, secure, peaceful and nurturing places for them to be encouraged and allowed to grow into the people they are meant to be. 

I heard somewhere, "We should be the persons we want our children to be."  Or, something like that.  It really made me think.  Is the way I treat people the way I want my children and grandchildren to treat people?  Is the way I handle a perceived injustice the way I want them to react when they feel something is unfair?  Are the words and the way I speak them the words I want to come out of their mouths?  Are the choices I make in my everyday life choices I want them to make?  Are the relationships with people I am involved with the types of relationships and people that I want them to have in their lives?  The list can go on and on, i.e., food choices, clothes choices, housekeeping choices, music choices, etc.

Why is it that we want more for our children and grandchildren than we would have for ourselves?  Why do we continue to not treat ourselves with the respect and love we have for our children and grandchildren?  There is nothing in this world that I would not do for my children or grandchildren to make them feel happy, safe, comfortable, healthy, and worthy.  Why do we not do all of that for ourselves?  It goes back to the "we should be the persons we want our children to be" statement.

I started this blog with the idea that it would be upbeat and about a gramma's love for her granddaughters and it turned into something else.  I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the Casey Anthony trial in the background has anything to do with that.  Probably.  Bottom line is....We need to protect our children.  They are amazing gifts given to us with the presumed understanding from God that we will keep them safe.

So, back to the gramma's love part of this blog.  I never quite understood the familiar statement, "Being a gramma is great.  I get to spoil the grandchildren and then send them home."  First of all, I'd like to never send them home...lol.  Second of all, I think my job is about more than spoiling.  For me personally, it's about loving them unconditionally.  It's about showing them the fun, light things in everyday.  It's about teaching them why we should respect animals, people and things.  It's about having fun no matter what outside turbulence may be surrounding them.  It's about listening to their wonderful stories and encouraging their imaginations.  It's about creating a safe and comfortable place for them in my presence.  And, it's about my heart dancing every time I hear them say "Gramma Sandra".

That's about it.  Remember your responsibilities to those children in your lives.

BE KINDER

Hi Again!  Wow, it's been a long time since I've written.  I've been so busy just living life.  A quick update includes Christopher moving home for a while, then buying his own house and moving out.  It's only about 5 minutes away and a wonderful place.  I'm so proud of him.  My brother Doug came down for a quick weekend visit...oh, how I love him.  Mom and Dad are in Arizona for their yearly snowbird stay and keeping me busy with walks, movies, trips to the casino (at my urging), wonderfuleatsomuchwefeelsick meals, and lots of memory-making moments.  Tayo is as busy as a young man could be.  His girlfriend Genee is expecting my second granddaughter any day now, so I'm planning a trip to Oregon as soon as that happens.  Can't wait to see them and all those little girls again.

Okay, on to the business of BE KINDER.  I am an official business owner and the name of my company is BE KINDER.  As most of you know, I have been creating shoes for friends, family, and others.  It has been a wonderful journey and I have loved hearing all the stories about people's reactions to the shoes.  I have a friend working on my website as I write this and can't wait to get it up and going.  It will be simply bekinder.net.  I'll send out a notice when it's up and running.  The following is my mission statement:

It's not so much about the shoes, but rather the words BE KINDER.  My hope is that with each pair of shoes I create for someone, with all their favorite things on them, that the BE KINDER will also become important to them.  As such, anyone admiring them will listen to the person talk about their favorite things and inevitably engage in a BE KINDER conversation.  If by seeing my painted words BE KINDER causes one person to actually be kinder, then I have made a difference.  That is my mission, to make a difference with one BE KINDER at a time.  Whether on a shoe, shirt, hat, chair, or wristband, to see the words BE KINDER is to be made aware...and that is a good thing.

I am also on a mission to get on the Ellen show to help spread the BE KINDER word.  I sent her T. shirts, wristbands, and car magnets in April 2010 and made her shoes and sent them in October 2010.  I've been writing emails and letters with the hopes to hear from her.  A couple weeks after I sent the shoes to her, she started closing her shows with, "Be kind to one another."  Coincidence?  Who knows.  I am just thankful that the message is getting out there.

So, that's about it.  Not a very exciting blog to get back into the swing of it.  For those of you who have been asking me to write again, I promise I'll be back soon, and thanks for your patience.  

BE KINDER.